Article by Olga Levancuka
Yes, believe it or not, apps may be way forward to finding love over 50. Why waste your time by going to the events or pay hefty fees by registering on online dating sites when your dream partner is literally a finger tap away, and often for free.
Or is it so?
On the first glimpse dating via apps is exciting, direct and provides you with that feeling of spontaneity and living dangerously. On a second glimpse, it is just like every other way of dating, face-to-face, blind date, arranged date, online date or by meeting a person at an event. So before you can jump to conclusions saying ‘it’s all about apps‘ it’s not. It’s all about putting yourself out there. It’s about stating that you are ready to move on. It’s about making a decision and going for it.
And the beauty of the apps is that the feedback and reaction is … instant.
You’ll get people either connecting with you or not. If they connect, great. Get some dates booked in, ensure you meet in a place you know so that you are less nervous and also not particularly expensive in case you pay or share the bill or decide to cover the whole bill during your exit strategy.
If you don’t connect via the apps then, change, adapt, rephrase. Often the photos we think represent us well, are the worst photos as they are often not genuine – we try too hard. Find a photo of you laughing or a photo of you feeling relaxed and perhaps reading a book or having a nice time by the see-side (fully dressed! please).
When it comes to describing your profile on the app, less is more is the best advice. Describe your passions and not what you are, what you have or what you’ve achieved.
If you get responses but not the dates, change the way you communicate, with the apps it really is more about deciding whether or not you agree to meet each other, where, what are you planning to do… and then see where it takes you or how it’ll go. In short: don’t put too much effort into communicating via the app – it is about meeting. And that is perhaps the beauty of the apps vs online dating, where you spend hours and days of building the dialogue, connecting, then eventually meeting the person and… discovering he is not the one.
Dating Apps for Women over 50
Here is the list of some of the apps that my clients have used and with some positive results:
Created by past Tinder employees, Bumble puts women in charge. It works like Tinder, both men and women can swipe right, with the only difference that only women can initiate conversation. If you don’t start the conversation, the match disappears within 24 hours. If you are a woman who knows what she wants and is frustrated with numerous messages from men that sometimes make you feel uncomfortable, this is the platform for you. Just like Tastebuds, Bumble is not built with an older audience in mind and is a very visual app so if you’re looking for a more gentle ‘getting to know you’ approach Bumble probably isn’t the best option for you.
Romantic or creepy? Happn is a dating app which has been variously described as both. When you open the app on your phone, you’re greeted by a collection of other users with whom you’ve physically crossed paths throughout your day. Bringing the reality back into online dating is a nice idea but it’s definitely for the braver souls out there so it might not be the best option if you’re gradually getting back into the whole dating scene. If, however, you can’t be bothered with the whole ‘getting to know each other before meeting’ philosophy of the other sites and you just want to see what’s out there then go for it. After all, the fortune favours the bold!
Tastebuds is the new kid on the block connecting singles based on their music tastes which can be great for those of you who love music and going to gigs. Its low commitment nature with ‘concert buddy’ and ‘friend’ options takes the pressure off and can encourage you to get to know someone through music you both enjoy. It’s a great way to connect with someone if you feel that your dating skills are not quite up to scratch however, the app seems to attract a much younger audience as it’s built with millennials in mind. This can be quite disheartening when trying to find a suitable match and may make you feel like an outsider.
Stitch has been named ‘Tinder for oldies’, however this site helps over 50s develop meaningful romantic and platonic relationships rather than the more random hook-ups of Tinder and Happn. Let’s be frank though, if you’re looking for a much younger person then you’re not going to find them on here. The app has a warm feeling to it and it’s obvious that the developers understand their audience. It also
gives you a friendship option which can be great for those who feel reluctant. Members have to go through a verification process which includes showing proof of ID before being able to chat to other users. The app also suggests fun activities for users that have been out of the dating game for a long time. It’s a great dating site for the over 50s.
Have you tried any of the dating apps yourself? Would love to hear about your experience with them?