Divorce | Fabafterfifty.co.uk

31 Mar 2012

The worst thing you can do after your divorce is NOTHING…

Posted in Divorce, Features | Leave a comment

Article by Adele Theron. Exercise: Take some time to think back on your life. How have you dealt with loss in the past? (Whether it was the loss of someone special or a beloved pet) ————————————————————————– ————————————————————————– ———————————————————————— What steps did you take that were healthy and healing? ————————————————————————– ————————————————————————– ————————————————————————– What steps did you take, or not take, that hampered your recovery? ————————————————————————– ————————————————————————– ————————————————————————– Healing doesn’t simply happen over time. Healing is an (more…)

21 Mar 2012

How easy is it to move on from a marriage or relationship marred by domestic abuse?

Posted in Couples, Divorce | 1 Comment

Guest article It was with a sick feeling in my stomach that I read Denis Waterman’s admission and justification as to why he hit his ex wife Rula Lenska. He differentiated between the fact that Rula was ‘hit’ and not ‘beaten’. His excuse? She was intelligent, she could argue well, he couldn’t win an argument with words so he lashed out. She was too clever. I myself had to extricate myself in my early 30s (more…)

10 Mar 2012

The impact of NOT healing from your divorce…

Posted in Divorce | Leave a comment

Article by Adele Theron When you repress your emotions, your behaviour and reactions to events in the present are really reactions to past events, too. This has a negative effect on your relationships. You can’t be fully present with those you love until you have released your emotions from the past. Not dealing with your emotions over an extended period of time can also lead to premature ageing and major illness in your body. Said (more…)

06 Mar 2012

What does your emotional journey through your divorce look like?

Posted in Divorce | Leave a comment

Article by Adele Theron Lucy’s emotional journey: This graph below tracks the healing experience of one of Lucy, a 54 year old woman experiencing divorce which came as a major shock when her husband suddenly left her. It illustrates the first year of the past five years of her life as drawn by her. Lucy’s rollercoaster started off with a big shock stage, an initial paralysis at hearing the bad news of her husband leaving (more…)

04 Mar 2012

Why your friends and family are sometimes the worst support during your divorce

Posted in Couples, Divorce, Family Matters, Features | Leave a comment

Article by Adele Theron Although your friends and family are an important part of your life, you may find that they’re ill equipped to support you through your loss. I found that even though my friends and family were well meaning, they didn’t know what to say to me and I often didn’t feel better around them. Before you chuck up this well-meaning lot, remember that although they’re trying hard, they’re just not equipped or (more…)

28 Feb 2012

Avoid Short Term Emotion Avoidance Tactics during your divorce healing journey

Posted in Divorce | Leave a comment

Article by Adele Theron John James and Russell Friedman tell the story of how a mother may deal with a child’s crying by offering the child a cookie. The mother may say “Don’t cry. Here, have a cookie and you will feel better.” Later in life, that child could associate fixing their feelings with food. Eating the cookie in the moment, the child gets distracted and may forget about the incident that caused the upset, (more…)

24 Feb 2012

So what are some of the common feelings when experiencing a shock divorce?

Posted in Divorce | Leave a comment

Article by Adele Theron My name is Adèle and I am a Divorce Angel. I remember the first four days after my husband left. They were brutal. At 02:30 am I was on my third glass of wine and hadn’t eaten in three days. I had been in my pyjamas for 36 hours straight and had chain-smoked 40 cigarettes (and I’m not even a smoker!). There was a pile of laundry on the couch waiting (more…)

12 Jan 2012

A Letter to Mum, how a poem helped reunite a family shattered by divorce

Posted in Divorce, Family Matters | 2 Comments

Guest article by Jan Jack We asked Jan, who we featured as a ‘Fabwoman’ to explain more about how her poetry has touched lives When I first set up Perfect Verse someone asked me “How on earth are you going to make money? It will NEVER work.” A good question – albeit combined with a somewhat negative view. But even I am amazed at how versatile poetry can be; since that time I’ve written Best (more…)

06 Jan 2012

When Self-Love Means Rewriting the Rules – Defining my own Divorce

Posted in Divorce | 3 Comments

Article By Lisa McCourt I teach the combined arts of authenticity and self-love, and one of the most profoundly transformative skills my students learn is the ability to rewrite rules. When you start loving yourself enough to script your own life, independent of the expectation of others, shift happens. My most difficult and significant rule re-writing took place as my marriage was winding down. Greg is a warm, kind, smart, generous, and all-around wonderful man, but (more…)

31 Aug 2011

27% of Divorcing Couples Give ‘Falling Out of Love’ as Reason. Tips to Keep Love Alive Midlife

Posted in Couples, Divorce, Mid-life Matters | Leave a comment

Guest article by Dr Gian Gonzaga 27% of divorcing couples cited ‘falling out of love’ as the main reason for getting a divorce. With more divorces of the over 50s being instigated by the wives than the husbands- what can the over 50s do to keep romance and love alive midlife. As children leave home, changing the dynamics of home life, becoming an emptynester can place a strain on some marriages. Dr Gian Gonzaga, Director (more…)