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Fabafterfifty: Couples

Issues arising in long term relationships discussed

  1. Parisian Valentines

    Tips to celebrate valentines Parisian way image
    Article by Meredith Keeve  a.k.a. The Wandering Parisian Yes, Valentine’s Day has become an international occasion, even in France there are cards and decorations for Cupid’s fete. However, our Fabulous French Fifty year old knows there is nothing less romantic or inspiring than dinner in a restaurant on the night of February 14th.  A “Holiday Special“ menu, overworked waiters, crowded tables, and a great deal of social pressure do NOT a fun evening make. Much as they decline to go out on Saturday nights (preferring to leave downtown to millennial revelers and tourists) the Parisienne is unlikely to insist on a restaurant dinner for Valentine’s Day. For a truly romantic evening, stay in! First, figure out how much your restaurant meal would set you back, including taxis or parking, and...
  2. The ‘Grey’ Divorce: Why is it Becoming More Common to get Divorced at an Older Age

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    Statistics clearly show that it is now far more common for people to get a divorce at an older age – the “grey” divorce. This doesn’t necessarily mean that the nature of romantic relationships has changed, but is perhaps indicative of a more accepting and liberal society. An Irish Divorce In an article for the Washington Post, Brigid Schulte detailed how her grandparents had lived separate lives without getting a legal divorce and referred to the situation as an “Irish divorce”. This is a term that describes couples who, because of societal pressures, decide not to pursue divorce formally, but instead just to live apart. This type of separation would not show up on official statistics, but now because such societal pressures are seen as archaic the number of people who once felt them feel free...
  3. Five signs that you should end your marriage

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    Article by Helene Fermont   Today is “divorce day” – statistically the day with the most divorces in the year. But how do you know when it’s time to end your marriage? We asked psychologist Hélene Fermont for her advice. Marriages can be difficult and it’s hard to know when you are just going through a rough patch, and when it might be time to call in quits. Hélene Fermont, psychologist and novelist, says that only you can decide when the relationship or marriage has come to an end, but has listed some warning signs that signal it might be time to move on. When the respect is gone If there is no respect for the other person in a marriage, it is only a matter of time before it crumbles and fails. If...
  4. Dating over Christmas: Save your Dating Adventures for the New Year

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    Article by Olga Levancuka Christmas, lights, festivities, caroling!  Everyone is out and about. Shopping, cuddling, hugging, kissing and smiling. And here we are, happy by ourselves. We know where we are with everything in life, we are comfortable with what we’ve got, yet with the New Year approaching, we feel that we have to set some kind of resolutions. We feel energised, full of expectations for the year ahead and even ready for a challenge. If you’re single, then dating is probably on your list. And that is exactly where it should stay at this time of the year. Let me explain. Christmas is traditionally a time of year when rationale goes out of the window and sometimes we can make bad decisions about things that we think will make our life better and that includes dating but dating...
  5. Steps for cohabiting couples to protect their finances

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist Cohabiting couples are calling for a change in the law to give them the same rights as married couples. The findings of the latest in a series of surveys reinforce a lack of understanding among this fastest growing family type which makes up 17.5 per cent of families in the UK and which is forecast to keep growing due to the revival of the property market. One third of cohabitants believed they had same rights as married couples but, contrary to popular belief, there is no legal status in England and Wales for cohabitees. The law if you live together and relationship ends If you live together, the law does not offer the financial protection a married person would have if their...
  6. Relationships over 50: How to rekindle your relationship when the children leave home

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    Article by Ar’nie Krogh After the initial ‘Honeymoon’ period and excitement of building a home together, things will have inevitably gotten hectic with the arrival of kids. There’s school runs, PTA meetings and football matches in the early years. Then comes the more serious, problematic teenage years, which are bound to keep your household exciting. You may or may not have had too many cross words between your kids and your partner, but before you know it, these little birds have left home, and you’re left with the ‘empty nest syndrome’. Silver divorces are on the rise It’s a sad fact that today, silver divorces are on the rise. These are couples who are divorcing in their 50’s and above and are the same people who were the pioneers of a 2...
  7. Why pre-nups enable openness and transparency to flourish

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist The increasing popularity of pre-nup agreements reflects how couples view their open and transparent nature as a positive factor when planning their wedding. Far from castigating the agreements as clinical and unromantic, more couples are showing that while seeking to protect inherited or family money, they also want to do ‘the right thing’ by each other – and by any children. In our vast experience, too many people marry without proper discussions about important issues such as families and careers and entering into a pre-nup promotes healthy dialogue. Also, a high percentage of couples who marry are older and have more income and capital. The disclosure aspect means that both are committed to openness. Pre-nups have grown in popularity and influence since a 2010 Supreme Court ruling recommended that, although...
  8. After the Death of his Mum: How I have tried to help my husband get through his grief

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    Article by Juliet Young When my mother-in-law fell seriously ill last summer it came as such a shock to our whole family that we had no idea how to react. Why her? She was surely the healthiest of us all. Only seventy-two years old and fighting fit. After early retirement she had started to run regularly and had completed several 10km races, coming in at just over an hour. Pretty damn good for her age! She ate well, hardly drank any alcohol, always carefully looking after her body and her skin. She was a slim, beautiful Jackie Kennedy lookalike and a real inspiration for the younger women in our family. I knew her for almost thirty years and never once saw her...
  9. Are dating apps the way to find love over 50

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    Article by Olga Levancuka   Yes, believe it or not, apps may be way forward to finding love over 50. Why waste your time by going to the events or pay hefty fees by registering on  online dating sites when your dream partner  is literally a finger tap away, and often for free. Or is it so? On the first glimpse dating via apps is exciting, direct and provides you with that feeling of spontaneity and living dangerously. On a second glimpse, it is just like every other way of dating, face-to-face, blind date, arranged date, online date or by meeting a person at an event. So before you can  jump to conclusions  saying ‘it’s all about apps‘ it’s not. It’s all about putting yourself out there. It’s about stating that you are...
  10. Five factors that facilitate a good marriage AND a “good” divorce

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist A good marriage and a “good divorce” might sound like extreme opposites – however both can hinge on critical common factors which can pave the way for a civilised split. Here are five areas that coincide in a good marriage and a “good” divorce. 1 Put your children first  The needs and sensitivities of children should be at the heart of a good marriage and the focus of a break up. Avoid arguing or criticising each other in front of them and reassure them that they are loved by both parents. Most importantly, if you are separating, reassure your children over and over again that it is not their fault. 2 Communicate effectively Communicating openly, honestly and frequently are the foundations of a...
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