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It’s always good to share with friends- old and new, so why not make yourself a cup of coffee or pour a glass of wine and join in the conversation.

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Fabafterfifty: Couples

Issues arising in long term relationships discussed

  1. Steps for cohabiting couples to protect their finances

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist Cohabiting couples are calling for a change in the law to give them the same rights as married couples. The findings of the latest in a series of surveys reinforce a lack of understanding among this fastest growing family type which makes up 17.5 per cent of families in the UK and which is forecast to keep growing due to the revival of the property market. One third of cohabitants believed they had same rights as married couples but, contrary to popular belief, there is no legal status in England and Wales for cohabitees. The law if you live together and relationship ends If you live together, the law does not offer the financial protection a married person would have if their...
  2. Relationships over 50: How to rekindle your relationship when the children leave home

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    Article by Ar’nie Krogh After the initial ‘Honeymoon’ period and excitement of building a home together, things will have inevitably gotten hectic with the arrival of kids. There’s school runs, PTA meetings and football matches in the early years. Then comes the more serious, problematic teenage years, which are bound to keep your household exciting. You may or may not have had too many cross words between your kids and your partner, but before you know it, these little birds have left home, and you’re left with the ‘empty nest syndrome’. Silver divorces are on the rise It’s a sad fact that today, silver divorces are on the rise. These are couples who are divorcing in their 50’s and above and are the same people who were the pioneers of a 2...
  3. Why pre-nups enable openness and transparency to flourish

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist The increasing popularity of pre-nup agreements reflects how couples view their open and transparent nature as a positive factor when planning their wedding. Far from castigating the agreements as clinical and unromantic, more couples are showing that while seeking to protect inherited or family money, they also want to do ‘the right thing’ by each other – and by any children. In our vast experience, too many people marry without proper discussions about important issues such as families and careers and entering into a pre-nup promotes healthy dialogue. Also, a high percentage of couples who marry are older and have more income and capital. The disclosure aspect means that both are committed to openness. Pre-nups have grown in popularity and influence since a 2010 Supreme Court ruling recommended that, although...
  4. After the Death of his Mum: How I have tried to help my husband get through his grief

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    Article by Juliet Young When my mother-in-law fell seriously ill last summer it came as such a shock to our whole family that we had no idea how to react. Why her? She was surely the healthiest of us all. Only seventy-two years old and fighting fit. After early retirement she had started to run regularly and had completed several 10km races, coming in at just over an hour. Pretty damn good for her age! She ate well, hardly drank any alcohol, always carefully looking after her body and her skin. She was a slim, beautiful Jackie Kennedy lookalike and a real inspiration for the younger women in our family. I knew her for almost thirty years and never once saw her...
  5. Are dating apps the way to find love over 50

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    Article by Olga Levancuka   Yes, believe it or not, apps may be way forward to finding love over 50. Why waste your time by going to the events or pay hefty fees by registering on  online dating sites when your dream partner  is literally a finger tap away, and often for free. Or is it so? On the first glimpse dating via apps is exciting, direct and provides you with that feeling of spontaneity and living dangerously. On a second glimpse, it is just like every other way of dating, face-to-face, blind date, arranged date, online date or by meeting a person at an event. So before you can  jump to conclusions  saying ‘it’s all about apps‘ it’s not. It’s all about putting yourself out there. It’s about stating that you are...
  6. Five factors that facilitate a good marriage AND a “good” divorce

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist A good marriage and a “good divorce” might sound like extreme opposites – however both can hinge on critical common factors which can pave the way for a civilised split. Here are five areas that coincide in a good marriage and a “good” divorce. 1 Put your children first  The needs and sensitivities of children should be at the heart of a good marriage and the focus of a break up. Avoid arguing or criticising each other in front of them and reassure them that they are loved by both parents. Most importantly, if you are separating, reassure your children over and over again that it is not their fault. 2 Communicate effectively Communicating openly, honestly and frequently are the foundations of a...
  7. This Miraculous Marriage: How we have stayed together for almost thirty years.

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    Article by Juliet Young     When I say miraculous I am not talking about meeting a knight in shining armour who swept me off my pretty little feet, then rode us across the Channel on his faithful dappled steed without getting its hooves or our toes wet, turning water to wine every night for dinner, thereafter happily living a life of smiles and hugs and lurve. What I really mean is that it’s something of a miracle that, after almost thirty years together, we are still here, still a Mr and Mrs Same Name, still definitely a couple. A couple of very different, hard-headed personalities who have amazingly stuck it out for the long haul. So far in any case. I’m sure this must be a modern-day miracle because, Holy McZoly, it hasn’t always...
  8. Midlife relationships: Is your relationship ’til death us do part?

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    Article by Maxine Harley   If you’re still in love with your childhood sweetheart then long may that continue. Sadly too many of us have not had that blessed experience. There are many types of relationships – and by the time we’ve reached our 50s we’ve probably either heard about, or experienced some of them ourselves. After chatting to a couple of female friends recently it got me thinking about how relationships feature in and shape our later lives.   What emotions does the word ‘relationship’ bring up in you? Safety, security, comfort and support? Stress, hostility, fear, pain and sacrifice? Your relationships are about YOU The relationships we attract are a reflection of the relationship we have with ourselves. We attract what we give out. What we give out changes as we change. We get what we sub-consciously believe we deserve, and then we get...
  9. Four key factors to consider as an older divorcee

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist  With longer lives and longer health, vigour and mobility, it is unsurprising that separation and divorce rates among seniors are rising too. Long suppressed little irritations and tensions, that might have niggled for many years, but whose impact may have been lessened by the demands of children and busy lives, could achieve greater importance once the nest is empty or people start winding down to a life after work. It might be that one or both partners only stayed in the marriage until the children had flown and, unable to face the often daunting prospect of spending every waking moment together, now want out. People are living fuller lives longer and a husband or wife may simply meet somebody and want to spend...
  10. How cancer can take its toll on relationships – and how to move forward

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    By Vanessa Fox, Having battled with breast cancer and divorce in the same year, I understand from personal experience how the stress and anxiety of a diagnosis can take its toll on the most robust relationship. As more women survive the disease, there is likewise a greater recognition of how it impacts on couples’ lives and partnerships – both during and after treatment. The stress and anxiety of cancer will be a turning point for many marriages – especially those that were already under strain pre-illness and not best positioned to withstand the disruption that its treatment and management will cause. The unwelcome seismic life event and the daily emotions, challenges and decisions it forces couples, especially those with children, to face, will severely test any relationship. It can also...
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