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What if they don’t love me anymore if I reclaim my Passion?

reclaiming passion for life imageArticle by Sharon Eden – the Passion Whisperer

You were not born without Passion.  For Passion is your very essential life energy; the juice in your tank, the dynamo in your engine.

It’s your Passion which made you cry as a baby… Pay attention!  I’m cold, I’m hot, I’m hungry, I’m wet, I’m in pain, I need attention to know I exist.  Then, later, it’s your Passion which fuels your curiosity, your organic experimentation with sitting, walking, talking, running, learning….

But what if you get messages that it’s not OK to express your Passion.  There’s a joke in my family that I spent the first 18 months of my life crying.  There’s even a photo of me standing in my cot, hands clenched around bars, obviously distraught.  I wonder what caused my crying and what that did for connecting with my Passion.

Then, later, being shamed and humiliated for my zingy energy.  Being called ‘show off’, ‘who does she think she is’, ‘too big for your boots’.  And so I learned to ‘depress’ my full-rich-passion-life-energy to live a low grade energy life because that was what was acceptable.

Your history might not be the same.  But for many of us there’s a general thread of having to shut off our Passion to belong to the tribe into which we were born.  There’s a social push for unthreatening ‘sameness’, for us to conform and not rock the boat.

We want to be loved and accepted by the significant others in our lives… In the beginning, of course, these were our parents and family.  So, if squashing our Passion was the price to pay for being loved and acceptable… we paid it.

Unless you rebelled, of course.  Exploding with anger for your denied Passion you would have purposely pricked and stabbed at ‘the way we do things around here.’  And feigned not caring.  You might even have gone off to find another tribe where you would be acceptable like the Mods, or the Punks, or the Hippies… or whatever.

Reclaiming your Passion can feel  fearful

So, reclaiming your Passion can feel fearful because you associate Passion with all those painful things in the past.  But, hey, that’s your history not your present.  You are a grown and magnificent woman now and nobody but nobody… except you!… can stop you reclaiming your Passion.

Tell yourself that reclaiming your Passion is your birth-right and heritage.  Tell yourself that people who truly love you will be delighted for you… because they will.  Keep telling yourself these truths until they become your truth.

As for the rest, if there are any who don’t like you being more of gorgeous you, living with Passion, hey, they were in the relationship only for themselves and not also for you!

Check out my next and final blog to find out how women change the world with Passion… and that includes you!


© 2013 Sharon Eden and The Passion Whisperer

Sharon Eden

Sharon Eden, MA, is a psychotherapist who helps people recover from low mood and depression in 6 session or less and find the piece of their personal development which hides in the shadows. Read her blog posts about bouncing back and sign up for her inspirational Bounce Back Prompts at www.bouncebackuk.com

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