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What’s more upsetting, your children moving out or moving back in?

boomerang kids  imageArticle by Fab after Fifty

You work hard to raise good kids who will be able to make it on their own once they arrive in the real world. And although it can be a heart breaking day when they finally leave the nest, it’s also a moment to feel proud and look forward to the next stage in your time as a parent. You get to see your kids forge careers and become independent adults; maybe one day you’ll even have grandchildren to enjoy.

So it can be a bit of an unexpected surprise when one or more of your kids returns home long term. But the fact is this is happening more and more. And it’s not because we’re not preparing them for the world or because they aren’t capable and ambitious. The UK has reached a record high for numbers of 20-40 year olds who are having to return home because rents are so high, and deposits for properties so difficult to save for, that they can’t support themselves or save enough money while living away from the family home.

If your child is having trouble raising funds for a mortgage, there are a number of joint mortgage options out there that can enable you to help them out, such as the family springboard mortgage from Barclays. Of course, this is not always possible, so it can be upsetting for a parent to see their children unable to access the opportunities that were available when they were younger. Many young people grew up in family homes that their parents were able to buy decades ago, and which have subsequently doubled or tripled in value. Meanwhile the next generation is struggling to get onto the first rung of the ladder in a housing market, job market and economy that makes it impossible for some people to save at all.

How do you feel about your children moving back home

Barclays bank recently ran a survey to see whether parents find it more upsetting when kids move out or when they move back home to save for their futures. The survey found that about 40% find the moving out stage much harder, whereas only about 27% think it is more upsetting to have kids move back in. This may suggest that parents are very aware of the reasons why their children may need to return home for further support, and it’s not seen as a failure of any kind but rather a necessity in the current economic climate.

So if your kids had to move home to save up enough money to one day buy their own home would it be hard for you? Would you feel like your own independence was compromised? Or would you be glad to have them back for a while?


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  1. Jo Carroll

    June 9, 2014

    Oh heck – I’ve been there. They go, they come back, they go, they come back, they go to live the other side of the world, they come back with a baby … I decided to give up on angst1 The door is always open for them, so I go with the flow now. (And do a little flowing of my own, of course!)

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