Relationships | Fab after Fifty | Information and inspiration for women over 50 - Part 5

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Five signs that you should end your marriage

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Article by Helene Fermont Today is “divorce day” – statistically the day with the most divorces in the year. But how do you know when it’s time to end your marriage? We asked psychologist Hélene Fermont for her advice. Marriages can be difficult and it’s hard to know when you are just going through a rough patch, and when it might be time to call in quits. Hélene Fermont, psychologist and novelist, says that only you can decide when the relationship or marriage has come to an end, but has listed some warning signs that signal it might be time to move on. When the respect is gone If there is no respect for the other person in a marriage, it is only a matter of time before it crumbles and fails. If...
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Dating over Christmas: Save your Dating Adventures for the New Year

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Article by Olga Levancuka Christmas, lights, festivities, caroling! Everyone is out and about. Shopping, cuddling, hugging, kissing and smiling. And here we are, happy by ourselves. We know where we are with everything in life, we are comfortable with what we’ve got, yet with the New Year approaching, we feel that we have to set some kind of resolutions. We feel energised, full of expectations for the year ahead and even ready for a challenge. If you’re single, then dating is probably on your list. And that is exactly where it should stay at this time of the year. Let me explain. Christmas is traditionally a time of year when rationale goes out of the window and sometimes we can make bad decisions about things that we think will make our life better and that includes dating but dating...
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Dating over 50: What is Ghosting?

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Article by Ceri Wheeldon When it comes to dating over 50 there are so many new obstacles to navigate. Dating has changed since we started dating first time around!! A new term that crops up in dating today is ‘ghosting’. I asked dating and relationship expert Olga Levancuka what exactly ‘ghosting’ was – and as it happened to be halloween, it seemed like a good time to share a quick video clip on the topic. It seems that ghosting is when you meet somebody, have several dates, seem to be getting along really well, and suddenly,everything goes quiet, and communication stops. So why do men ‘disappear’? (To be fair some women do it too) As Olga explains in this video, men don’t want aggravation in their lives. They don’t...
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How grandparents can avoid feeling marginalised when their children divorce

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By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist While grandparents are legally entitled to make their own application for access to, or custody of, grandchildren during divorce proceedings, they have traditionally not tended to do this for fear of damaging their own child’s chances of contact. This often leaves the older generation feeling marginalised as they wait for parents to allocate some time for them to spend with grandchildren. Our advice at Jones Myers is that while they should not take sides in the divorce, grandparents play an instrumental role in children’s lives and should try to stay involved with them. They should emphasise the useful roles they can play – such as handovers and childcare – so that both parents will welcome them as safe, as opposed to critical, custodians. When...
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Why my pink leather jacket became a symbol of my new found freedom.

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Article by Ceri Wheeldon I have had this pink biker jacket for at least 16 years – it was a purchase prior to my getting together with my now ex husband. It was my favourite item in my wardrobe. I loved the colour – a significant departure from my usual black – and the feel of the leather. It seemed surprisingly to go with so many things in my wardrobe. My now ‘ex’ hated me wearing it. His rationale was that he had never seen a pink cow. The same rationale did not apply to his navy leather jacket however, or his blue shoes – it seems that pink cows were the problem. I put the pink jacket at the back of the wardrobe. Gradually other items suffered the same...
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Tactile Tactics: How the firmness of the chair impacts the outcome of the date

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Article by Phillip Adcock Looking for love in all the wrong places If you find you’re luckier at cards than you are at love, you need to pay more attention to what you’re sitting on when out on a date. Scientists have long known that people sitting on hard surfaces make firmer business decisions, while those sitting on soft cushions tend to be a “softer touch.” When deciding where to go out on a date, then, you may want to factor in what you’ll be sitting on during your liaison. Do you want your partner to be a tough negotiator or more compatible? And don’t overlook the other things you touch while on your date. The type and weight of cutlery in the restaurant and the carpet on...
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Looking for Love After 50 Online – The Best Senior Dating Sites

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It’s been more than 20 years since Match.com, the world’s first official dating site went live and caused a stir amongst the online community. It’s safe to say that the popularity of online dating has increased dramatically since then, and today, there are over 1,400 matchmaking sites catering to all ages. Studies estimate that 1 in 5 relationships now start online, and those over 50 years of age make up for almost half of those looking for love in cyberspace. Being over 50 doesn’t have to be a hindrance when it comes to dating, and there is an abundance of sites that cater to those who are back on the market. The term ‘grey dating’ has even been coined, due to the influx of over 50’s who seek out companionship and more on the web. If there...
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Why Autumn is the Perfect Time to Fall in Love?

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Article by Olga Levancuka Even if you love Autumn, the end of the Summer season means it’s the end of BBQs, bathing suits and carefree time. For many people, the end of summer signifies the end of fun and even for people who don’t have kids, the ‘back to school’ mindset can awaken old anxieties about going back to school. On top of that, the change in temperature and light will also affect your mood so perhaps the last thing on your mind is dating. On one hand, you may not be feeling like going on a date quest but on the other hand you’re probably thinking ‘But who am I going to spend Christmas with?’ The good news is that autumn can be the best time to meet someone. Yes,...
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Steps for cohabiting couples to protect their finances

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By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist Cohabiting couples are calling for a change in the law to give them the same rights as married couples. The findings of the latest in a series of surveys reinforce a lack of understanding among this fastest growing family type which makes up 17.5 per cent of families in the UK and which is forecast to keep growing due to the revival of the property market. One third of cohabitants believed they had same rights as married couples but, contrary to popular belief, there is no legal status in England and Wales for cohabitees. The law if you live together and relationship ends If you live together, the law does not offer the financial protection a married person would have if their...
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The Secret to Getting Back Out There After a Divorce

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Without a doubt, getting back out there is one of the toughest things to do after a divorce. You probably lost touch with many of the buddies you had before you got married, and the friends you have made since now feel awkward and torn between the two of you. When you spend time with people who were mutual friends, there will always be that elephant in the room. You know how it goes; they sensitively try to avoid any subject, story or memory that involves the two of you, and in the end the conversation just peters out, because they only really know you as part of a couple. Starting afresh and finding a new social circle is never easy, especially if you got emotionally burned...
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