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  1. 5 ways to get over a break up

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    Article by Carole Ann Rice To the first person who ever experienced a break-up, the Academy award goes to you. Recovering from a case of a broken heart is no easy feat. Whatever end of the break-up you were on, the pain of splitting up can be severe and intense. As many times as your friends and family may tell you to “move on,” that’s is easier said than done. The agony experienced during a break-up is like no other, even if you were aware that ‘the end is nigh’. To that end, Life Coach Carole Ann Rice has compiled her top tips on how to come out of a break-up… and survive: Top tips to survive a break up 1. Don’t deny pain – give yourself time to feel angry...
  2. The first steps to take when your divorce is inevitable

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    Article By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist    The realisation that divorce is inevitable can result in wide-ranging emotions spanning despair, frustration – and fear of starting all over again. It is very rare that the person instigating the break up, or the partner who is being left, are prepared for the collapse of the marriage. Embarking on a life-changing path can seem a daunting and difficult journey. The steps below will help you to start and manage the divorce process: Check you can apply for a divorce   You must be married for over a year before starting divorce proceedings. Your marriage must be recognised by UK law and in most instances you or your partner will be living in England or Wales when making an application. You will also need to produce your marriage certificate. Establish...
  3. The ‘Grey’ Divorce: Why is it Becoming More Common to get Divorced at an Older Age

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    Statistics clearly show that it is now far more common for people to get a divorce at an older age – the “grey” divorce. This doesn’t necessarily mean that the nature of romantic relationships has changed, but is perhaps indicative of a more accepting and liberal society. An Irish Divorce In an article for the Washington Post, Brigid Schulte detailed how her grandparents had lived separate lives without getting a legal divorce and referred to the situation as an “Irish divorce”. This is a term that describes couples who, because of societal pressures, decide not to pursue divorce formally, but instead just to live apart. This type of separation would not show up on official statistics, but now because such societal pressures are seen as archaic the number of people who once felt them feel free...
  4. Five signs that you should end your marriage

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    Article by Helene Fermont   Today is “divorce day” – statistically the day with the most divorces in the year. But how do you know when it’s time to end your marriage? We asked psychologist Hélene Fermont for her advice. Marriages can be difficult and it’s hard to know when you are just going through a rough patch, and when it might be time to call in quits. Hélene Fermont, psychologist and novelist, says that only you can decide when the relationship or marriage has come to an end, but has listed some warning signs that signal it might be time to move on. When the respect is gone If there is no respect for the other person in a marriage, it is only a matter of time before it crumbles and fails. If...
  5. How grandparents can avoid feeling marginalised when their children divorce

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist  While grandparents are legally entitled to make their own application for access to, or custody of, grandchildren during divorce proceedings, they have traditionally not tended to do this for fear of damaging their own child’s chances of contact. This often leaves the older generation feeling marginalised as they wait for parents to allocate some time for them to spend with grandchildren. Our advice at Jones Myers is that while they should not take sides in the divorce, grandparents play an instrumental role in children’s lives and should try to stay involved with them. They should emphasise the useful roles they can play – such as handovers and childcare – so that both parents will welcome them as safe, as opposed to critical, custodians. When...
  6. Why my pink leather jacket became a symbol of my new found freedom.

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    Article by Ceri Wheeldon I have had this pink biker jacket for at least 16 years – it was a purchase prior to my getting together with my now ex husband. It was my favourite item in my wardrobe. I loved the colour – a significant departure from my usual black – and the feel of the leather. It seemed surprisingly to go with so many things in my wardrobe. My now ‘ex’ hated me wearing it. His rationale was that he had never seen a pink cow. The same rationale did not apply to his navy leather jacket however, or his blue shoes – it seems that pink cows were the problem. I put the pink jacket at the back of the wardrobe. Gradually other items suffered the same...
  7. The Secret to Getting Back Out There After a Divorce

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      Without a doubt, getting back out there is one of the toughest things to do after a divorce. You probably lost touch with many of the buddies you had before you got married, and the friends you have made since now feel awkward and torn between the two of you. When you spend time with people who were mutual friends, there will always be that elephant in the room. You know how it goes; they sensitively try to avoid any subject, story or memory that involves the two of you, and in the end the conversation just peters out, because they only really know you as part of a couple. Starting afresh and finding a new social circle is never easy, especially if you got emotionally burned...
  8. Divorce over 50: Friendships as you move on

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    Article by Ceri Wheeldon From my own experience, friendships do change as you go through a divorce –  and your new life creates opportunities for new friendships. Divorce is never easy at any age – and navigating your way through friendships as you go through the process and come through the other side can be difficult – especially if you have an ex who not only tries to take ‘ownership’  of  assets but clearly sets out friends he believes he ‘owns’ as well! Not an issue to be argued in the divorce courts, but certainly one that needs some careful handling. I have been incredibly lucky in that as a result of my divorce I have some very special friendships that have become stronger  now that my ex is out of my life, but I...
  9. Why pre-nups enable openness and transparency to flourish

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist The increasing popularity of pre-nup agreements reflects how couples view their open and transparent nature as a positive factor when planning their wedding. Far from castigating the agreements as clinical and unromantic, more couples are showing that while seeking to protect inherited or family money, they also want to do ‘the right thing’ by each other – and by any children. In our vast experience, too many people marry without proper discussions about important issues such as families and careers and entering into a pre-nup promotes healthy dialogue. Also, a high percentage of couples who marry are older and have more income and capital. The disclosure aspect means that both are committed to openness. Pre-nups have grown in popularity and influence since a 2010 Supreme Court ruling recommended that, although...
  10. Five factors that facilitate a good marriage AND a “good” divorce

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    By Peter Jones, founder of Jones Myers family law specialist A good marriage and a “good divorce” might sound like extreme opposites – however both can hinge on critical common factors which can pave the way for a civilised split. Here are five areas that coincide in a good marriage and a “good” divorce. 1 Put your children first  The needs and sensitivities of children should be at the heart of a good marriage and the focus of a break up. Avoid arguing or criticising each other in front of them and reassure them that they are loved by both parents. Most importantly, if you are separating, reassure your children over and over again that it is not their fault. 2 Communicate effectively Communicating openly, honestly and frequently are the foundations of a...
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