“You’re over fifty? And you’re just getting married? Is this your second marriage?” If you’ve heard these words before, rest assured that you aren’t alone. Society likes to tell us that we should each be happily married by 28, with 2.5 kids by the time you’re 33. That way, when you’re 51, your kids are all adults navigating their lives, and you have the rest of your life to lead in whatever way you choose.
However, that’s far from reality. Many women put effort towards education and their career in their twenties and thirties, and might get around to finding the one in their forties, but aren’t in any rush to get married. If you find yourself getting married in your fifties, you’re in luck. You likely know more about who you are and what you want out of a big celebratory party than you did when you were in your 20s. Here are some tips for getting married later in life, whether this is your first or not-so-first wedding.
Remind yourself it’s about the marriage, not the wedding
As you get older priorities change, you may find yourself realizing that things you held so dear twenty years ago seem frivolous or even unnecessary today. If you want to have a small intimate wedding with just close friends and family, go ahead and do that. If you want to have a huge bash with hundreds of family and friends, the choice is yours. When we are younger weddings tend to reflect family expectations. When getting married in your 50s the wedding can reflect you and your fiance. Weddings have changed enormously since we were were in our twenties, with so many more options in terms of venues and ceremonies. At the end of the day though, remember that its all about joining in partnership with another person.
This is a lot easier to remind yourself of when you’re fifty or sixty, instead of 20 or 30.
In addition, because it’s about the marriage, have your fiance get involved in planning. Gone are the days of one person planning the wedding.
Have you ever said this to yourself? “Ugh, a wedding invitation? But I only get to relax/travel/go out/etc on the weekends.” That means you know all the things that you don’t want to have at a wedding that makes people say Ugh. While your wedding is for you, it’s also for the guests you want to invite. If you aren’t religious, skip the long ceremony. Plan for the unexpected, like rain in August. Try to meet your guests halfway by inquiring about allergies or food restrictions and serving options to meet those dietary restrictions. Your ideal wedding doesn’t need to be huge, and it doesn’t need to tailor to every guest’s needs, but ultimately being considerate of how others might feel at a wedding can go a long way.
The Wedding Dress
When we say ‘wedding dress’ it conjures up the image of a long white dress and veil. There are so many more options. Think elegant, sophisticated. In terms of styles, look at the outfits worn by guests at the society (or Royal) weddings in the press and visualise them in ivory. When selecting the style remember that during the ceremony your guests will be seeing the back of your outfit and for many of the photographs will be taken of you and the groom from the chest up, so neckline is key. You have every prerogative to get dressed up. If you want an extravagant gown, go for it. Want a themed wedding? Nobody’s stopping you. Try checking out some of the wedding dress reviews at Phase Eight wedding dress reviews to see if you can get a good feel for what you might be interested in wearing.
Your wedding is as significant a day in your 50s as a wedding in your 20s . Plan it, enjoy it. Make it a day to remember.